As a counselor who teaches the Sons of Helaman principles every week, it has been a great experience to connect the young men in my group with the “Come Follow Me” curriculum that the Church has for us to study during these uncertain times.
A personal experience that happened to me about a month ago in which I was able to use the principle, “Warrior Chemistry”. This is a great example of being able to apply these Sons of Helaman principles in my daily life.
Though this experience was not regarding sexual behavior, it was about human behavior and how applying true principles can help to focus on what is most important in our lives and what we can do to protect what is most important to us.
One day, after working my normal hours from 8:00 am to 4:30pm at my full-time job, I then went to visit a client I was working with from my family business that provide services for people with disabilities. The visit took about an hour or so and then I decided I would visit a member of our ward on my way home.
These daily visits to a ward member is a goal I set for myself to accomplish in order to meet and get to know the members in my ward, as Bishop. It usually did not take too long because of COVID, it usually consisted of an introduction and brief conversation that took place on the doorstep or front porch.
On this particular day, after working a full eight hour day, visiting with a client for another hour or so and then stopping to visit with a ward member for another half an hour or so, it was probably about 7:50pm by the time I reached home.
My wife and I had also set a goal to try to exercise together at our local gym at 8:00pm each night.
This night, after a long day and all the visits, I was tired both physically and mentally. All I wanted to do was to sit down on the couch in our living room and watch TV and nothing else. Of course, it was already 8:00pm, and the usual time for my wife and I to go to the gym.
My wife came downstairs and said, “OK, I’m ready to go, so hurry and get ready so we can go to the gym.” I responded very rudely, “Can I just relax a little first, because I just got home from doing a bunch of stuff today?!”
I could tell by the look on her face that she was not only hurt but offended by my tone of voice as well as my response.
She quietly turned around and went back upstairs.
After a few minutes, I went upstairs and got changed and then said, “Okay, hurry up let’s go and work out!”
She was very quiet as we drove to the gym and did not say a word to me but had her earphones in her ear listening to her music. In fact, she did not say one word to me the entire hour we worked out together.
Usually, while she did cardio on the treadmill, I would lift weights or also do some cardio alongside her. During our workouts, we would usually talk to each other or check on each other to see how long we both had before we ended our workouts.
However, this night, she neither looked at me or attempted to say anything to me and I did not attempt to talk to her either.
I then began to go over in my mind what happened before we got to the gym. I realized that I was not talking to my wife because I was tired, and I had hurt her feelings by being rude to her. As I continued my workout, I remembered the principle of “Warrior Chemistry”.
As I reviewed my behavior, I realized that Satan just got me with a “chemical spill” and I was allowing him to get between me and my wife with my rude behavior and pride. The silence and rude behavior were interfering with my relationship with my wife.
So, my “Warrior Chemistry” kicked in and I thought to myself, “I am NOT going to let the adversary get into my marriage and get between me and my wife!”
So, I made a conscious decision to fight for my wife, our eternal marriage, the covenants that we made to each in the temple and for my family. I decided that the first thing I would do when we got in the car was to apologize to my wife for my poor behavior and hope she would forgive me.
After I apologized and she forgave me, I was able to better appreciate the antidote of “warrior chemistry” because I applied it in this situation, and it worked.
Although, the situation was not regarding unwanted sexual behavior, as young men seek to overcome in the Sons of Helaman program, it was still a destructive behavior that was changed through using the Sons of Helaman antidote of “warrior chemistry.”
In the Book of Mormon, we read about Captain Moroni and the “Title of Liberty”. I love that he emphasizes the importance of knowing what is important and being willing to do whatever is necessary to protect what it is that is important to you.
In this case, the “Title of Liberty” is fighting our enemies “for our religion, our freedom, and our peace, our wives and our children.” We also see other prophets in the Book of Mormon emphasizing the same motivation to fight this way. In the most recent study of the “Come Follow Me” lesson of Mormon 1-6, the prophet Mormon, who was also a great military leader among his people, discussed the importance of fighting for our homes, our wives and children.
This is the foundation of “Warrior Chemistry.”
We must decide what it is that is important to us that we are willing to fight for and then do whatever necessary to protect it.
If we fight in this manner and learn to become skilled in using this antidote, we increase our chances of succeeding in our fight in overcoming the adversary and all of the tricks he will use to try to defeat us.
The Lord has given us the tools to win our many battles against the adversary and if we continue to use the antidotes and principles of the gospel to fight, God will always be at our backs to strengthen us, on our side to encourage us and in front of us to lead us in overcoming anything the adversary throws our way, just as He did for all His children in the scriptures.
Sam Brown has a master’s degree in Social Work and is a Licensed Vocational Rehabilitation Counselor. He facilitates Sons of Helaman groups as well as provides individual therapy. To register for a Sons of Helaman group with Sam, visit the Sons of Helaman Enroll page for more information. If you are interested in making an individual appointment with Sam, please contact him directly at email@example.com or 801-205-2988